Stockpot Seaoners 4-2 Real JD
Stockpot Seasoners easily rolled over Real JD on sunday night with goals from Tim Sherwood, Chris Kiwomya and Robert Rosario to put the latest dent in (under-pressure) player/manager James Walker's promotion hopes.
Sherwood opened the scoring inside six minutes as he linked up with Rosario and sidestepped Slater to sweep the ball into the back of the net to put the Seasoners a goal up. Moments later and Stockpot doubled their advantage as Real JD were left horribly exposed at the back as Kiwomya fed Sherwood who squared it to Rosario who stabbed the ball beyond a beleaguered Phil Davis. At halftime Walker tried to change things as he brought on Swannick and Dandy but it was to avail, the Seasoners went three-nil up within minutes of the restart to effectively end the contest when Sherwood slid the ball under Davis from a Kiomya throughball. Carlos pulled one goal back for Real JD following a nice move with Dave Sorensen but within a minute Kiwomya restored the three goal advantage when he thumped a shot into the top-right hand corner to make it 4-1. With the last kick of the game Alex Dandy added to his impressive goals tally (ten in all competitions) when he pulled a goal back but 4-2 it finished.
Stockpot remain eighth despite the win and Real JD have dropped to seventh and Walker was unable to contain his dissappointment: "I like to think I'm generally upbeat and I'm a happy-go-lucky boss but that, out there (pointing at astro-turf) tonight was fucking wank...passing was awful, heads went down after each goal and we didn't apply ourselves, oh my God it was truly, truly awful...I was unlucky though."
On sunday, though, Real JD have the ideal opportunity to get right back into the thick of promotion as they take on league-leaders Sexy Doughnuts who only drew last week. "Yeah, to bounce back with a win there would be ideal because they are top and it would cut their lead to three points and push us up to fourth." Said Walker.
1.Davis 2.Summerfield 23.Slater(sub:13.Swannick) 4.Walker 12.Sorensen 9.Dandy(sub:17.Carlos)
FRIENDLY
JD-Lions 4-2 Stephen Hawking X6
JD Lions were awarded another 5-0 forfeit victory in division four to ease relegation worries and played a friendly instead, which they won 4-2. Carlos opened the scoring after eight minutes with a well taken goal, having already hot the post with a shot from the halfway line at kick-off! Player/Manager James Walker got on the score sheet aswel as Alex Dandy, who scored twice, in a game that was never really in doubt for the Lions.
1.Davis 2.Summerfield 23.Slater(sub:13.Swannick) 4.Walker 12.Sorensen 17.Carlos(sub:9.Dandy)
FRIENDLY
Red Star Well-played 1-5 Manchestarab City
Due to a fixture clash Red Star Well-played had to draft in a last minute goalkeeper to replace player/manager Phil Davis, Ronnie Random went 'in-nets' thanks to stand-in manager Matt Shotton who organized proceedings and even claimed his second goal for the club: "Well, y'knorr I lark to gor up frunt sumtymes and 'av a gorr at shooootin' an' iz paid off cuz 'appen' I goda gorrl." Said the big, Yorkshire Gaffer. However Red Star went on to lose the mis-matched friendly by 1-5 which is respectable as they faced premiership opposition.
13.Random 3.Shotton 5.Patel 6.Connor 25.Dempsey 26.Youseff
FURIOUS PIGEONS RESPONSE TO THE WEEK OF FOOTBALL
1.Mike 'I'm just a regular fan' Ashley at Newcastle, apart from flying from his mansion to St James' Park via helicopter to eat prawn sandwhiches before kick off! You twat! You are not an ordinary fan. The only thing you have in common with real Newcastle fans is that you are fat, ugly and think that Newcastle are a top-four club.
2.Manchestarab City Football Club are on the way to the big time with new owners from Abu Dhabi, good luck to them aswel. It will make football even more inteeresting and crazy than usual.
3.Andorra 0-2 England; so England won but are called 'boring'...at least they won, lets just admit it, England are shit and the players don't give a shit. They can't do right for doing wrong anymore. England fans won't be happy unless we win the world cup, even then The Sun will probably label them 'boring' for running the ball into the corner flag for the last 30 seconds of injury time.
4.Scotland are still shit.
5.Fair play to pretencious bald frog, Fabien Barthez for the creation of his goalkeeper academy that doubles up as a posh scholl in the french alps. Albert Camus life-style theories behind the whole affair.
6.On a personal note the pigeon wishes to express his sadness for the liquidation of NCP Manchester, the works-team that Phil Davis created and masterminded to tournaments in London, Stockport and Amsterdam.
7.I heard that Man City signed Robinho as a result of a typographical error. Apparently administrative staff at the city of manchester city stadium in the city of manchester city centre were left red-faced when finalising a drinks manufacturer sponsorship deal with Ribena: "Oh for fuck's sake, I've told those dyslexic twats a million times...." lamented a 'furious' Mark Hughes.
8.France are shit.
9.Romania are shit so fuck off Muutu, you mole-faced, coke-head, twat.
10.Is James Walker feeling the pressure at JDFC franchise?
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